Sometimes friendship isn’t about whom you’ve known the longest it’s about who came and never left your side. Emphasis on Sometimes; it’s not always like that for some people. I know people who have been friends for over 10 years and their bond is still very strong. In this life the one thing I’ve dealt seriously with is friendship. You know it gets quiet when you realise someone’s forgotten you and even more quiet when you see you have been replaced. You know when nails grow long, we cut nails not fingers; similarly when misunderstandings come you cut your ego not your relationship with your friend, because it is hard to tell your mind to stop loving someone when your heart deep down still does. But still just because a relationship ends doesn’t mean that two people or friends stopped loving each other; they just stopped hurting each other.
Friendship has whipped and bent me trust me because I’m always too selfless when it comes to my friends and I don’t even expect anything in return. Everyone has flaws and insecurities, we are all humans and we constantly evolve, not every close friend is a friend, only very few care for you and we should never try to make amends with others when it is not our fault in that relationship, be it friendship or romantic one. We all shouldn’t have ego, but there is a fine line between that and self respect. We should never lose our self respect for anyone else.
People come and go. That is the harsh truth. We are all driven by thoughts, life is full of dreams, fulfilled and unfulfilled; thoughts of what makes our lives, good ones tho so instead of dwelling over things that are not in our control, letting go is the best option. Letting go of people, attachments and expectations. It’s extremely tough but needful. We all just have to accept that people change and their priorities change as well. We may be important to people but not all the time. The biggest challenge is to accept this. We just need to silence our mind and life would be much more simple.
There will be times in which when you are present, your presence will not be acknowledged and in your absence, your absence will not be felt. People will always be their original self when you are of no value to them and their lives and become pests just to maintain the relationship when they benefit from you, they don’t even care or love you so they stay connected to you because they enjoy the benefits and they do the minimum. There’s a saying “Friends are like stones scattered everywhere but true friends are like diamonds very rare to find”.
Some friendships are not just meant to be. They are just eager about what happens in your life, they don’t actually care. They just want to monitor your movements, growth and achievement. It’s more important to remove yourself from people who hurt you more than they love you because nothing is more important than your peace of mind. You’re unique in your own special way. You know not everyone has the same mentality as you, not everyone cares about you but truth is that no one can ever be like you.You know who really cares at your worst times, but always remember these people only know your name, they don’t know your story; they’ve only heard what you’ve done, they don’t know what you’ve been through. It’s just a mere perception about you, they haven’t lived your life for you. They don’t know you completely so pay less attention to their misconceptions.
Friendship breakups are so weird especially when there’s no beef. Y’all are not just close anymore but just someone you say hi to in order to avoid awkwardness. You know what I hate? When I try really hard with a person and they just don’t fucking see it. Like I could literally rip my heart out of my chest and give them my last breath but it will go unnoticed. Shits the worst. My whole mindset has changed. I’ve learnt to appreciate and respect myself, my emotions, my feelings, my self respect and to forgive myself when I fail or hurt and cut off toxic people. I can’t even force my way into anybody’s heart or life.
Stress is the least thing I need right now. If I feel like this friendship is draining me or fighting with my peace of mind and happiness, I’m not dealing with it at all. I take friendship so serious. I’ll literally do anything for you without hesitation if you do right by me. It’s actually heartbreaking when you watch someone important to you change into a person you don’t want anything to do with. We all just need to know when people’s part in our story is over and just let go in order to avoid stress and protect our peace of mind. Right now I can’t say I have a lot of friends I’ll just be lying to y’all… I don’t and I actually do not mind. Just a few… I’m okay with the small circle of friends I have right now and if there’s need for change again once I realise they’re playing with my peace of mind and emotions, I’ll leave trust me.
Don’t let other people of this world disrupt your peace. I’ve lost bonds I wanted forever this past few months so I’m not too pressed about who’s in my life or not. It’s sad but life is full of sudden goodbyes.
Have you ever been in situations like this?
How did you take the end of toxic friendships?
Do you miss them and want them back?
Do you feel they deserve a second chance back into your lives?
Is it not better to protect your peace of mind than to get stressed everyday?